The ABC’s of REBT

What is REBT?

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy is a form of cognitive-behavioral therapy developed by psychologist Albert Ellis in the 1950’s that focuses on overcoming irrational beliefs to better manage one’s emotions and behaviors. It’s primary teaching states that it is not external events that cause us distress but our interpretation of them. The ultimate goal of REBT is to become aware of one’s beliefs and thoughts that are often rigid and self-defeating and replace them with more flexible, rational ones.

Activating Event the situation that starts the process below

Beliefs automatic, internal, often irrational thoughts and interpretations of the activating event

Consequences emotional & behavioral results of these beliefs & thoughts

Now consider this instead:

Illustration:

You’re walking down the street and see your friend on the other side of the street and wave to him. (Activating Event). He doesn’t wave back.

Possible outcomes of this scenario:

You think, “How rude of him.” “I guess I’m not worthy of a hello.” (Belief)

You feel hurt, ignored, insignificant. (Consequences)

*** Your interpretation of the activating event, not the actual event itself determined how you end up feeling about that event.

Dispute   Ask yourself: am I basing my thoughts on facts or feelings? Does my belief fit with reality? Where is evidence for this thought or belief? Am I jumping to the worst possible conclusion?

Effect   Consider the mix of balanced thoughts and beliefs gathered from disputing done prior. This takes into account both positive and negative information in an attempt to evaluate all information. “My friend didn’t wave hello, but this doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to be my friend, perhaps he just didn’t see me.”

You’re walking down the street and see your friend on the other side of the street and wave to him. (Activating Event). He doesn’t wave back.

You think, “Oh, he mustn’t have seen me.” (Dispute) “I’ll catch up with him later, we’re good friends.”

You feel unbothered and look forward to chatting later. (Consequences)

What’s the point of this? It’s not helpful to jump to conclusions about any activating event when you find yourself feeling badly. Instead, determine how you interpreted the event, what you thought or believe about it and notice how quickly your feelings change toward it.